I recently went backpacking in Thailand. Words almost can’t describe the things I did and seen. So let me break it down for you as best as I can.
BANGKOK – after 20 hours of flying and 2 hours of sleep I decided to explore all that Bangkok has to offer. I checked out the indoor mall (the stop after the MDK mall on the train). I was never so happy for air conditioning. A sweltering 47 degrees and pollution that could cut off your breathing was not a good start. I met up with two friends and we went to Sea World. It was pretty cool but nothing special. We had a lot of fun at the wax museum. After that we got a tuk tuk to Khao San Road. This is the Main Street with shopping and bars. This is where we met Mister T Black Hat. Shoutout to you my brother. You definitely showed us a good time! After 4 hours of touring around he took us down this sketchy back alley to a ping pong show. If you do not know what this is, you are lucky. It was one hour I will never get back in my life. We watched these Thai women do weird shit with their vaginas. Ping pong ball throwing, smoking, writing notes with a marker. These women are talented!!! Then came the main event. A man and woman had sex to “how do I live – LeAnn Rimes”. Hey ms rimes, good work! We ended our night back on Khao San Road. We drank till the sun came up and purchased a million laughing gas balloons. During the night we lost one of our friends in the crowd. While he was alone he saw 10 Thai guys beating up a white dude. He thought he would be a hero (not recommended) and help this guy out. He described the Thai guys as “ninjas” as they were all dressed in black and started whipping his side with whips chasing him down the street. It was scary in the moment but it is something we would laugh about for the rest of the trip. It was also the songkran festival (water splashing festival). People had buckets of water and squirt guns. We made it home soaked, mud between our toes, but all in one piece. We survived Bangkok…barely!
KOH PHANGAN – This is the island where the famous Full Moon Party is. We stayed at the most beautiful resort named “The Coast”. Highly recommended! http://thecoastphangan.com It is about a 5 minute drive to Hadd Rin Beach. Do not stay at a hotel on the beach. The party goes all day and night and it was nice to get some R&R without all the hustle and bustle. The FM party was fun! Everyone is decked out with body paint, neon clothing, and buckets of liquor. Redbull and vodka was my friend. (Red bull originated in Thailand). Fortunately, my heart is still pumping haha.
KOH TAO – After getting on a ferry stuffed like sardines we landed in Koh Tao. We stayed at the seashell resort on the beach. This is a more chill place. After a night of partying we decided to go scuba diving that next morning. Waking up hungover in hot weather and little sleep is not a good idea when you have diving planned. The boat rocked back and forth and so did the feeling in my stomach. I watch a lot of National Geographic so the ocean scares the shit out of me. I was a trooper and did it for my friends. Best idea they had yet! What an amazing experience. After the dive I got back on the boat. Not knowing which end is about to burst from my body, I started throwing up over the side of the boat. Did I mention most washrooms do not have toilet paper in Thailand? Enough said. Bring tissue in your bag at all times! When we got back I went for a Thai massage. It was very acrobatic. They use their entire body to massage you. bucket list…check!
KOH SAMUI – We took another ferry over to this next island. We stayed at The ARC. This is a huge party hotel. They have beach and pool parties from 2pm to 2am. Getting a room by the beach was an awful idea if you want sleep. We bought tickets to a Muay Thai fight. The main event ended with a guy getting KO’d and throwing up all over himself. We also did an elephant trek. This was so cool! The way they treat the elephants was not cool. Metal picks being slammed into the animals ears. Chains around their necks. They weren’t even in a jungle. We went through people’s yards and I almost hit 10 different power lines. Bucket list.. Check! We also put our feet in these little aquariums that had fish that would eat the dead skin off your feet. I didn’t last long doing that. We booked a flight over to Phuket. Flying is definitely the choice of travel. 15 hour bus rides are not fun.
PHUKET – What a busy place! So much going on. Very overwhelming. We hit up the Moulin Rouge Cabaret. This is a lady boy show. Most of these lady boys have better bodies than most women I know! The rest of the time was spent relaxing as I had 24 hours of flying ahead of me. As I get to the airport I realized I threw out my departure card to leave the country. I approach the customs desk and politely ask what they can do for me. I was taken to a small room and told to give them 100 baht. I gave 200 baht. Bribing an immigration officer to get out of the country was not on my bucket list. But … Check!
What a crazy trip! It is memories like these that make me fall in love with travel.
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